Sunday, December 18, 2011
Often I'm in need of a hug
In my heart I need to write about this because it's has upset my world as I know it. Out of courtesy and respect to those involved I will refrain from names and detailed explanations here on this blog.
It's not for me too broadcast others troubles and surprise, surprise - I don't write anonymously, so some of you may know those in my life who are going through this trying time.
For any couple a decision to live in separate homes is not one too be taken lightly and at this time of the year and with children involved its even more devastating. I love both parts of this couple and I'm torn in half. Is it fair for me to want to scream "What about me, what about how I feel about this?" because that's what I'm thinking (plus a zillion other troubling thoughts)
How truly selfish and pathetic am I?
Despite their assurances that I will still see both of them, I know that things will never be the same. People change, they grow, they move on to new things with new people. Nothing can be the same. Trial separation is what's being discussed, I guess I'm not feeling too optimistic and yet I know I just have to butt out - it's not my life, it's not my business.
I feel like someone has kicked the chair legs out from under me and not first warned me they were going to do it (kick the legs out from the chair that is). I've hit the ground hard and the air has whooshed out of my lungs with a massive gush and I can't catch my breath. News like this has sort of sucked any joy out of my Christmas break.
I guess it will take time for me to adjust to it, time for the news to sink in. The thing is, I don't want to adjust, I don't want the news to sink in. I don't want anything to change because endings suck and none so much as this one!
Posted by Fiona Biedermann