Once upon a time if I didn't write daily I suffered from withdrawal symptoms. In saying that, I haven't written for almost two weeks and yet I couldn't make myself.
When life gets on top of me or makes me mad then I either struggle to write or I write continually.
This time I didn't want to write, I didn't touch my book, my website, my blog. I did however continue to write in my personal journal. Within those pages I am free to moan and whine and be the misery guts I was - see I'm human, but where possible I refrain from moaning to all of you here on this blog.
I'm not always inspired to dream, I'm not always positive. Sometimes life pisses me off...a lot and for the last few weeks I've lost my way. See I've always pictured what I want in my life and then I focus on those things becoming reality. Yeah it might sound a bit hokey to some people, but in most cases it has never let me down.
Plus it requires action, I don't just sit and wait for things to happen, I go out and make them happen where I can. After all you'll die of old age if you sit and wait for everything to come to you.
One particular focus of mine has been a long time coming... in fact I'm still waiting for it to happen. I'm not sure why it's not happening but if and when it does then I'll be free to talk about it and it will make sense to you then.
The other most recent one was to do with my eldest son and for some reason when I ask for something for one of my boys it usually comes about as well. Now I fear I'm starting to sound real kooky, but oh well why stop now?
Friday morning my words in my journal were 'I give up universe, you're obviously not listening to me at the moment'.
Two hours later my eldest son sent me a text message at work to ring him when I was free. His news, positive confirmation of one of the things only a few hours earlier I had bemoaned that I'd given up asking for.
Yes Universe, you're listening and I'm extremely grateful - but remember that song "what about me?" I'm not sure why you're holding out on me for the other thing and while I know everything happens for a reason, I'm not sure what the reasons for this are. Other than to make me damn miserable.
So, do you ask for what you want and then it happens, or do I sound just a little bit crazy - or a lot crazy even?
Regardless, here's to positive thinking and a happier week for everyone - me included because I definitely need to put my happy pants back on.